How to be the go-to problem-solver for your desired target market.

If you’ve yet to read 2020’s, The Connector Effect by Dr. Ivan Misner, Graham Weihmiller and Robert Skrob (or the current podcast it spawned), below is a crash course on all that these networking gurus preach when it comes to corralling the ideal customer.

For starters — and within two minutes, tops — write a response to each of the below questions or requests. Don’t overthink your answers and know that the more you treat this as a lightning-round style exercise, the more you’ll get out of it.

Describe your ideal customer

Many would-be marketers fail because they never define a target client. Instead, they use words like “everybody” or “anybody.” Defining a target market gives referral partners a mental picture of the best customer to refer to you.

Answer the following if your clients are consumers:

1. Think of a person who is already a great customer for you: what area do they live in?
2. What is their family status and profession?
3. How does their household income compare with the average?
4. What are they planning, bragging or complaining about?

If your clients are other businesses, answer these questions:

1. Think of a company that is already a great customer for you: What line of business is that customer in?
2. What’s the approximate size?
3. Who makes the buying decisions for your product or service?
4. What’s the problem they are trying to solve when buying your product?

By being specific you are serving your chapter members by giving them a clear idea of your ideal patron. The more detailed you are, the more effective they will be in finding those referrals for you.

What problems are you solving for these assets?

Too many business people talk about their products and services. This sounds self-serving but, in actuality, talking about the problems you solve makes you into a giver who attracts customers.

1. List at least three problems your good customer has that makes them ideal for your business.
2. What is the worst thing that could possibly happen to your clients if their problems aren’t solved?
3. What is the best thing that can happen once their problems are solved?
4. Do you have success stories to illustrate how you help your customers? (Client testimonials are a great way to give your network a clearer idea of what exactly you deliver and they demonstrate that your group members can trust you to deliver what you promise.)

Perfect your presentation

Now let’s pull the above information into a brief presentation.

Here are the three elements of the perfect business introduction:

1. State your professional classification.
2. Tell a brief story about a problem you solved for a customer.
3. Request a referral – who do you know who is [insert target customer] who suffers from the issue you corrected. Be specific!

Once you learn how to create these presentations for your business, you can use this skill for any club, charity or campaign you lead.

My eldest daughter, Ashley, got married earlier this year. The wedding was at a little venue nestled in Southern California near the ocean.

I experienced something during the wedding that is a great lesson for entrepreneurs everywhere. The sign of a good team is when they do their job well when everything around them is going right. The sign of a GREAT team is when they do their job well when something out of their control goes completely wrong – and yet, they find a solution. Finding solutions to unexpected problems is a strength for any business.

A couple hours before my daughter’s wedding, a vehicle took out a transformer in the neighborhood and the venue lost all power. This was a disaster in the making. However, the manager drove to a hardware store, and actually bought several generators which his team hooked up to the venue just in time for the wedding.

While the wedding party was frenetic over the loss of power, the manager and his team remained calm (at least in front of us) and positive that all would be right with the world, and they would take care of this. His confidence in his team, flowed over to the wedding party (including me – the father of the bride who paid for all of this!!!). There is much to be learned from an entrepreneur or manager who can respond to a serious problem while maintaining their composure in the midst of frantic clients during an ensuing crisis.

The venue brought the power back up with the generators they procured. Everything seemed ready to go. The power came on within minutes of the time that the wedding was to start. The guests were in their chairs, the music played for me to escort my daughter down the aisle. Then, everyone stood to see the bride just before I began to turn the corner to escort her to her awaiting groom… and the power went out again!!! I looked to my right and watched a team of people from the venue run to the generators and fix the latest challenge within seconds. And… the power was up once again within a few moments.

With that, the music also started again. The people remained standing. The venue went above and beyond to get all of us to this moment. Now, I had to escort a VERY frenetic bride-to-be down the aisle. Any bride would be frenzied at this point and my beautiful daughter was certainly in that headspace.

So, as I walked her down the aisle (a very long aisle I might add), I did what any father might try to do – make her forget about her nerves. I could feel her arm trembling as we took our first steps. I leaned over and whispered in her ear, “Have you ever wondered why you park on a driveway and drive on a parkway?” That was so obviously a random statement to make at that moment that she looked at me curiously and said, “What?” I replied, “Or, why is that you send cargo by ships and shipments by car?” The shear randomness of these questions started to make her chuckle. So, I went on to say, “why do you think we call them ‘cookies’ when we actually ‘bake’ them?” Now she’s actually laughing and people had to be wondering what the heck I was saying to her to make her

laugh. As we got closer to her groom I ended with one last question, “Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?” At this point she was no longer frenetic, and she had a huge smile on her face as I kissed her cheek, told her I love her, and handed her over to her groom. She was beautiful, calm, and very, very happy.

It’s hard enough to do everything right when things are going smoothly. The test of a team’s ability to perform is how they handle things when serious challenges are going on all around them.

The lessons in this story are:

• Remain calm during a crisis and project that sense of calm to your clients.
• Believe in your team (which means you need to have a good one).
• Don’t focus on the problem – focus on the solution.
• Act quickly to implement that solution.

Oh, and if all of this happens just before you walk your daughter down the aisle to get married, take her mind off the chaos and have some fun. This last bit of advice can actually work in many situations throughout your life and your business.

There’s a reason why your windshield’s larger than your rearview mirror.  It’s important to have the clearest view possible of where you are going.  As a result, your windshield is substantially larger than your mirrors.  Don’t get me wrong, it’s important to know what’s behind you and to learn from where you’ve been.  However, if all you are looking at is your rearview mirror, it’s because you’re going backwards.  When you do that in life, you are not living in the present and you are not aware of what may be ahead of you.

Sometimes in life we do need to go backwards a little bit.  However, as soon as possible, we need to put that car in Drive and move forward to our intended destination.  To get to that destination, we should have a map or an app to take us where we intend to go. We set our goal and identify the route to reach it.  Sometimes, we have to take an alternate route because of heavy traffic or accidents along the way (both good metaphors for life).  But in either case – you need to have a general idea of where you want to go. 

I know people who work hard, have a fast-paced life, and are always very busy, but they don’t set life goals (and some don’t even set business goals).  From my perspective, most of these people are lost.  They are lost because if you don’t know where you want to end up, going faster won’t get you there quicker.

Windshield wipers are another great metaphor for life.  Sometimes the weather is so bad, you need something to help keep things clear.  Other times, you need even more help than that.  Years ago, I was driving with my family up to our lake house in Big Bear, California.  Suddenly, we hit a patch of fog that was so incredibly thick, I could not see the road in front of me at all!  Worse yet, we were driving up a mountain so I couldn’t see anyplace that was safe to move the car off the road.  So, I rolled down the window and stuck my head out and literally drove ahead looking down at the little white ceramic Botts’ Dots that are on so many highways throughout the country.  [By the way, they are called Botts’ Dots after Elbert Botts who invented them in the 1950’s.]  I drove very, very slowly staying in alignment with the Dots while my wife looked ahead to warn me if she saw the lights of any car ahead of us (thankfully, she didn’t).  After a mile or two, the fog cleared enough for me to roll up my window and simply drive ahead slowly. 

To me, the metaphor for this is that sometimes we may need an assist to get where we are going. It may be our life partner or business teammates or a mentor who helps us see more clearly. The key is – we generally need to continue to move forward (safely – of course) in order to get to where we want to go.  

One last observation – don’t let objects obstruct your view out of your windshield.  There will be people in life that will get in the way of where you are heading.  Don’t let them.  There will be people who want to stop you or keep you from looking forward. Don’t let them do that either. Keep the windshield of your life as uncluttered as you should keep the windshield of your car.

Your rearview mirror is to see what is behind you, what you already passed, and what is in the past.  With the crazy times we live in, it is more important than ever to remember that your windshield is larger than your rearview mirror for a very good reason.  From this moment forward know that it is the view out of your windshield that will take you where you want to go in life. 

Called the “father of modern networking” by CNN, Dr. Ivan Misner is a New York Times bestselling author.  He is also the Founder of BNI (www.bni.com), the world’s largest business networking organization.  His latest book, Infinite Giving, The 7 Principles of Givers Gain^® is a book about building a life and business where you don’t have to choose between winning or helping others. 

In the 1975 hit movie ?Jaws?, Martin Brody, the Police Chief of a small summer resort town in the northeastern United States, utters one of the most quotable lines in film history when he gets his first up-close look at the Great White Shark.  As soon as he sees it, he slowly backs into the wheelhouse and says to Captain Quint, ?You?re going to need a bigger boat.?

This is the prototypical ?Brody Moment?: a shockingly unambiguous realization that the current resources are no longer a viable option to achieve the results you?re looking for. 

I hope to explain how my Brody Moment came about.  However, the most important thing is for you to think about ?your? Brody Moment as you read about mine.  Understanding your Brody Moment can help you think about your motivations and move forward successfully with your entrepreneurial endeavors.

My Brody Moment came at the end of 1985 after I had opened 20 chapters of BNI by accident – without a plan, without even trying. That?s when I realized that I had struck a chord in the business community.

I was a management consultant in Southern California and I needed referrals for my consulting practice. I needed referrals for my own business, and I hoped that I would be able to refer some of my friends. So, I put together a group where we could start passing business to each other.

I had previously gone to networks that were incredibly mercenary, everyone was trying to sell to me. I went to other groups that were totally social, with happy hour and hors d?oeuvres, but there was no business happening at those events.

I wanted something that had a focus on business without being mercenary and was relational but not transactional; something that wasn?t totally social because I wanted that relationship-building aspect that led to business. Therefore, I created a network that I hoped would satisfy those two considerations.

I wanted to merge that focus on business with the relational aspect, and the glue that would hold it together is the principal core value of Givers Gain^? – the idea that if I help you and you help me, we will all benefit by working together.

That one networking group led to another and another until there were twenty chapters within 12 months! That first year, I was method-acting my way through the process; I was figuring it out as I went. I was young – 28 years old, and I really thought most businesses had this figured out. The thing is, nobody had it figured out because we don?t teach business networking in colleges and universities anywhere in the world. What I didn?t expect to find was that everyone has this challenge and that was my Brody Moment.

BNI was an example of necessity being the mother of invention and it helped a lot of businesses. At the end of 1985, I figured out that I ?was going to need a bigger boat?. This way of business networking was going to be much larger than I anticipated, so I sat down and created my business plan to scale the company.

In June of 1986, I had a goal in mind. I went to the library to gather information on populations. (Remember, at that time there was no such thing as Google.)
After extensive research and many calculations, I felt that BNI could have 10,000 chapters someday.

Shortly after that, I told a friend that I thought there could be 10,000 groups someday. And he said, ?10,000?? I replied, ?Yeah, I think it?s possible.?
Then he asked me, ?And how many groups do you have now??
I answered, ?30.?
He said, ?And you think you could have 10,000??
?Yes, I think it?s possible,? I replied.
To which he said, ?It?s good to have goals, Ivan.?

Yes, it was a big goal. And every year, near the end of December, I took time to reflect. I had read the E-Myth by Michael E. Gerber early on and used that as a baseline strategy. I looked at what was working well, and what didn?t work at all.
Each year, I adjusted my plan and revisited the small goals that were all striving toward that one big goal of scaling my company into a global enterprise.

In December 2020, we reached it – BNI had grown to more than 10,000 chapters! And we continue to grow, helping BNI members around the world do business through referral marketing.

As a leader, you?ve probably experienced a few Brody Moments over the course of your career, and you?ve probably got a few more coming. What you do as a result, and how fast you do it, can turn a Brody Moment into a defining moment. 

Called the ?father of modern networking? by CNN, Dr. Ivan Misner is a New York Times bestselling author.? He is also the?Founder of BNI (www.bni.com), the world?s largest business networking organization.  His latest book, Infinite Giving, The 7 Principles of Givers Gain^? is a book about building a life and business where you don?t have to choose between winning or helping others.

Everyone wants some degree of success.  They might want it in different forms, but I’ve never met anyone who didn’t want to be successful in or at something important in their lives.  This is good, because I believe that everyone’s entitled to pursue success; but, success itself is not an entitlement.  

Success is largely determined by our hard work and our choices.  I know many people who work hard but make bad choices.  It’s amazing how many of them think they deserve to be more successful because they feel like they’ve worked so hard.  On the other hand, I don’t know very many, if any, successful people who have made good choices, but didn’t work hard.

Working hard is only the first part of success.  Making good choices is the second part.  It truly takes both to achieve success at whatever you do.

Many years ago, I knew someone who was constantly lamenting her “bad luck”.  She wasn’t happy with the various jobs that she had over the years, her personal life was a shambles, she was almost thirty, hadn’t completed college, and constantly had money problems.  She often blamed situations or other people for the various predicaments that she was in.  However, the glaringly obvious truth was that although she worked fairly hard, she continually made horrible choices.  One day she would complain about money and then the next day she’d buy something totally extravagant and completely unnecessary.  The next week she’d complain about not being able to get a good job while showing up to work an hour late for personal reasons (which happened regularly). 

From time to time she’d talk to me about her issues and I’d point out the choices she made that led to the current problem at hand.  Each time she’d pay lip service to acknowledging the connection, but the truth is she never took ownership for the real problem – her choices.  She once lamented “why me, why me, I deserve better!”  I didn’t offer my opinion on this question, but what I wanted to tell her was that “everyone feels like they ‘deserve better’ at some point in their life – get over it, stop complaining and start really doing something about it.  Work hard and make better choices!”

I’ve had the opportunity during my career to work with tens of thousands of people who have experienced varying degrees of success in their lives.  One of the recurring themes I see with these people is that they plan their work and work their plan. That is, they think through their choices, make the best ones they can with the information they have, and then work hard to carry those choices out. 

As the Founder for an international business, I know that the choices I make are sometimes pretty important to the business.  The decisions I make can impact hundreds of employees, franchise owners, and associates as well as tens of thousands of clients around the world.  Years ago, I was talking to a friend about some tough decisions I had to make and my concerns about them.  He gave me some great advice.  He said, “Not every decision you make has to be a good one.  Just make sure that you make more good ones than bad ones and when you make a bad one – minimize the impact by fixing it quick.”  Wow!  This was great advice.  It’s advice that squarely hits the point about working hard and making good choices.  Not every choice you make has to be on the mark.  However, enough of them do in order for you to get the kind of results you want.  Some of my biggest lessons in business have come from my losses, not my successes.  Generally, neither had much to do with luck but instead, with the choices I made or the commitment I gave to the project.

Not long ago I was talking to someone I’ve known for years about the growth of my business and some other personal goals I’ve recently met and he said, “Man you’re lucky.  It must be nice.”

I responded to him by saying “Yea, I’m lucky, let me tell you the secret to my luck…”

“First, I went to college for ten years.  During that time, I started my own business and worked fifty to sixty hours a week for two decades.  Along the way, I mortgaged my house a couple times for the company and I wrote over a dozen books.  You too, can have this kind of luck.  All you need to do is apply this kind of effort to whatever you do and you can be just as lucky.”

He laughed and said, “Okay, Okay, I get it!!”  Did he really get it?  I don’t think so, because he hasn’t changed his behavior or started making different choices.  If being successful was easy – everyone would have the success they think they deserve.

For most of those 2 decades I mentioned above, I didn’t feel very lucky or incredibly successful.  It took time, effort, hard work, and fairly decent choices before I felt any modicum of success.  The problem is that many people want to go from point A to point Z and bypass all the challenges in between.  They work hard, therefore “deserve” the success they want.

Success is not an entitlement.   It’s not a “right” or a “claim” that we should have.  Oh, people have the right to “pursue” success – but that’s it.  Success is most often earned, not handed over because you are entitled.   I think I was in my thirties before I really, truly, understood and internalized that notion.

Years ago I asked my nine-year old son to quote the “mantra” of success that I had been teaching him.  I said, “Trey, what’s the secret to success?”  He said, in a young boy’s slightly bored sing-song tone – “the secret to success without hard work and good choices is still a secret, Dad.  Can I go out and play now?”

OK, maybe nine is a little young to start the training… but, maybe not.Called the “father of modern networking” by CNN, Dr. Ivan Misner is a New York Times bestselling author.  He is also the Founder & Chief Visionary Officer of BNI (www.bni.com), the world’s largest business networking organization.  His latest book, Infinite Giving, The 7 Principles of Givers Gain^® is a book about building a life and business where you don’t have to choose between winning or helping others.

Two people sitting in a room, at the same table, having the same meal at the same time, can actually be worlds apart.  “How?” you ask.  Because they look at the world through a different lens.

I love astronomy and I’ve learned that by choosing different lenses or filters for my telescope, I can literally observe different things in the night sky.  By just changing the lens, the things I view can appear or disappear before my eyes.  Objects can be overwhelming bright and painful to view or they can be a beautiful sight to behold.  I believe that our lives are similar.  The lens we choose to see the world through can greatly influence the things we see and experience. 

Years ago, I realized that I needed to evict people from my life because the lens that they viewed the world through was negative, fearful, hurtful, and sometimes caustic. It was not the lens I choose to view the world through. 

The first thing I realized when I came to this conclusion was that words matter.  What you say about your world experience helps determine the world you live in and the people you attract into your world. What you put in your head, shows up in your world. Whether you’re talking about an abundance mentality vs. a scarcity mentality, the law of attraction, or the glass being half full, words matter.

The most common example of this for my life involves my ‘being busy.’  I talk to so many people who say, “you must be so busy?”  I no longer say ‘yes’ to that question.  Today, I say that “I have a full life.”  You can be busy – or you can have a full life.  Almost everyone says that their life is busy.  But busy shouldn’t be a goal worth pursuing.  If it were everyone’s goal – then most individuals would be happy and that is not what I see with most people.  Having a “full life” is a goal worth pursuing and having a “full life” brings me joy.  Words truly matter. 

I now micro-dose the news.  I don’t understand why negative news sells, but it does.  Frankly, it is no longer a “news” program, it is most often an “opinion” program   Why do we watch something that continuously makes our blood boil?  I quit.  I micro-dose the news through apps on my phone so I can stay up on what’s going on without hearing or viewing all the vitriolic opinions being pitched as “the news.”

Back in 2012, I was diagnosed with cancer.  I never told people “I have cancer.”  I always said I was diagnosed with cancer. It was my diagnosis – it was not who I was.  It took a while but now, rather than say that I am in remission, I prefer to say I am healthy.  Words matter.

2020 brought this out more clearly than ever for me.  While everyone was talking about being in “lockdown” or “quarantine,” I spoke about experiencing the “Great Pause” in life.  The pause button was pushed on all of our lives for over a year.  I found that how people responded to the Great Pause made a tangible difference relating to their experience and their life. Those people who learned how to embrace that mentality, when possible, where much happier than those who were mired in the horror of the situation, we were all part of.

When my wife of 31 years passed away in 2020, it would have been easy to say I was horrible when people asked me how I was doing.  But instead, I tried to reframe the grief I was experiencing into something that would allow me to have a different world view.  I’d answer friends by telling them that it is “one-day at time for me” or “I’m putting one foot in front of the other” each day.”  Feeling horrible was true.  But I also believed that living in that mental space would not help me through the difficult times.  One day at a time, and one foot in front of the other, was the lens I chose to focus on so that it allowed me to do my best to move forward.  Even when you feel horrible, words matter.

We live in fearful times.  I’ve learned that people get frozen by fear or they get focused by fear.  I propose that you get focused by fear.  Focus on a lens that will help you see through the fog of chaos that surrounds you and look for the possible.  Look for the positive. Look for how to reframe your situation so you can deal most effectively with the hand you have been dealt. Choose the lens that ‘you’ see the world through.  And always remember that words matter.

Called the “father of modern networking” by CNN, Dr. Ivan Misner is a New York Times bestselling author.  He is also the Founder & Chief Visionary Officer of BNI (www.bni.com), the world’s largest business networking organization.  His latest book, Infinite Giving, The 7 Principles of Givers Gain^® is a book about building a life and business where you don’t have to choose between winning or helping others. 

In 2017, I was sitting in the back of a senior leadership meeting for BNI.  The group was talking about the future of the organization and what we saw ahead of us as opportunities and challenges.  Someone from the group looked over at me and said, “you’re the Founder & Chief Visionary Officer, what do you see for the future of the company?”  I stood in the room and boldly said that because of advancements in mixed reality and holographic technologies, I thought the future of networking was likely to be online.  While I thought that would raise eyebrows – instead it raised voices.  “No way,” was the overwhelming chorus of voices in response to my proclamation. The pushback was almost complete (with the exception of a few of the millennials in the room). 

“Really?” asked one incredulous participant.  “Really, you’re the Founder of the world’s largest in-person networking organization and you honestly think that we will transition to online!?”   “Never,” said another person in the room. “I can’t believe that you would think that.”

I re-learned a valuable lesson that day – when you have a bold vision, don’t just blurt it out.  Instead, ease people into that vision.  People aren’t receptive to massive change at first, they need to be eased into that change whenever possible [see The Cat’s on The Roof blog to see how to do that].

Recognizing the error of my ways, over the next year I began to talk at company events about disruption and how companies could become complacent in the delivery of their services and how they sometimes don’t see the train coming down the tracks at them. I spoke about Kodak, Sears, and Blockbuster as examples of what happens if a company is complacent with their operations.  I hoped that these stories would get them thinking about how we might be disrupted if we were not careful.  I later wrote about this type of disruption on Entrepreneur.com after I’d been talking about it for well over a year.

In December 2018, I wrote another article for Entrepreneur about the change that I saw coming in networking organizations like the one I suggested a year earlier that caused such a vocal reaction when I brought it up.  I re-introduced this concept more than a year after I first blurted it out because I felt that I had laid the groundwork more effectively over the previous year.  It was my formal prediction in this article that the future of face-to-face meetings would be online.  Over time, I referred people in my organization to these two articles to help prepare them mentally for what I believed to be coming. Granted, I foresaw this development because of the emergence of technology and not a virus, but I saw it coming, nonetheless.

In mid-January of 2020, I was at a mastermind event where we were doing an exercise lead by Kian Gohar, Founder of Geolab. It was his “Moonshot Exercise.”   In it, he asked us to create a vision that we wanted to be embraced within our organization.  My vision was that by the end of 2020, the senior management of our company would see the inevitable fact that the future of networking would be, at least in part, online.  Little did I know that by the end of that very month, we would embrace that vision.

Credit needs to go to the CEO of BNI, Graham Weihmiller, who saw that Covid was going to be a far bigger problem in the world than anyone else in our organization thought (or people from most organizations for that matter).   By the end of January, he had transitioned some of Asia to online.  By February, he had transitioned much of Europe and by March of 2020, he, the franchisees, members, and the Global Support Team, had transitioned the entire organization to online.  This was no small feat.  In January of 2020, the company had 9,700 networking groups that were meeting in-person, every week!  By March of 2020, we had over 9,700 groups meeting online every week!  This was a pivot of monumental proportions.

Since that time, the company has added more than 400 additional chapters bringing the total number of networking groups to over 10,100 world-wide.  Virtually all of these groups were meeting online for most of 2020.  What seemed completely unfathomable to most just a couple years earlier became the norm in just two years.

The question now within the company is – “what does the future hold for meetings going forward?”  The answer to that question has not been settled but it is under discussion.  That process has begun with a survey of over 2,300 members from around the world asking them if they would like their networking meetings to be:

1) In Person Only,

2) Online Only, or

3) A Blend of Online and In Person Meetings.

As you can see in the results below, one third of the participants of this survey wanted to go back completely to “In Person” Meetings.  However, 16% wanted to stick with “Online Meetings Only, and a whopping (considering the attitude just two years prior) of almost 51% of the survey respondents were in favor of a blend of meeting both in-person, and online. 

Just a few years earlier – what was unthinkable to most leaders in the organization was now very possible for two thirds of the people surveyed by the organization.

Because of the continuous advancements in technology, the move to online networking meetings was inevitable.  The spread of Covid simply expedited the imminent disruption that lay ahead.   

Lead the disruption or be disrupted.  That is the mantra that entrepreneurs must embrace to survive in the 21^st century.  For networking groups, that means that it is time to embrace the inevitable transition to meeting online.  That said, I do believe that a blended approach is perfect at this time. For most business people, meeting in person and shaking someone’s hand (when it is safe for us to do that again) has no online equivalent.  

What are your thoughts about these ideas?

Called the “father of modern networking” by CNN, Dr. Ivan Misner is a New York Times bestselling author.  He is also the Founder & Chief Visionary Officer of BNI (www.bni.com), the world’s largest business networking organization.  His latest book, Infinite Giving, The 7 Principles of Givers Gain^® is a book about building a life and business where you don’t have to choose between winning or helping others. 

Givers Gain^® is not only a great way to get business; it’s an even better way to do business.  This is why BNI has made it our principle core value in our networking organization.

Giving has many cultural and legal differences around the world. In some cultures, giving is seen negatively, yet it is a positive force in society and that this can be applied in every business regardless of location or culture.

What is important in acts of giving is our motivation. Here is a list of motivations that fits with the philosophy of Givers Gain and helps us maintain mental clarity around our motivations when we give.

1. We give because we understand that in a community, what we do, others will do, and we all benefit.
2. We give because we know that in the same situation others would do the same for us.
3. We give because we want to give back where we have profited before.
4. We give because when we work together, we get bigger and better results than working on our own.
5. We give because we enjoy it.

Having ethical motivation is key to giving. You can always give once and justify your motivation, but giving over and over again requires a motivation that is understood not only by you but also by the people you surround yourself with. Adopting one or more of the motivations above will help you stay grounded to your motivation.

Here are some examples of where giving in business changed lives.

Allen. is a commercial real estate agent in Orange County, California, USA.

Throughout 2009 and 2010, Allen had met with as many businesspeople as he possibly could, using his network to find these people and to book a meeting with them. They were not just from his local BNI group but were members throughout the county. The more people he met, the more he was able to become a super connector for the local business community. He was generating a ton of business for the local economy simply by making connections and giving the gift of a referral.

He even won awards for it and became the star of his group. He was recognized as having the most one-to-ones, and he also gave out the most referrals. Allen focused on building relationships and once he was convinced he had found a good business opportunity for both of his contacts he would often phone the contact on the spot and put them together, thus creating a powerful introduction much more likely to lead to business.

When asked how all of this activity had affected his business at a bad time for real estate, he said, “I am completing the best year in my 26 years in the business. I have had a great, great year.”

Giving in business, as in life, works in many different ways. Here is another example.

David runs a fantastic print business. He offers a brilliant service, great value, and delivers when he says he will, if not before. If you ever try to pay him a compliment, he’ll offer a sheepish smile and an explanation that he was only “doing his job.”

Just up the road from where his business is based is the area’s largest independent hotel, which, of course, he is a trusted supplier for. After turning around an order on a particularly short deadline, the hotel manager, showing the gratitude effect, offered David a meal for two at the hotel’s restaurant as a way of saying thank you.

David thanked his client, graciously declined the offer, and instead asked for something else—for them to take the call of one of his other clients, a commercial designer and project manager named Suzanne. Suzanne had recently asked for help and David, being a supplier of hers, decided to use this opportunity to get her the introduction that her business needed.

The introduction was made, business was done, and both of David’s clients were happy.

In the true spirit of giving, the additional revenue has allowed Suzanne to take on larger development projects, which David now prints for. The local sub-contractors who are used on these projects have increased revenue and now come to David when they are in need of his products and, due to the quality of his work and products, they become ambassadors and referrers for his business.

David is selfless, humble, and a wonderful networker because he embraces the principles of Givers Gain. The cycle of giving continues to benefit him and those around him.

Acts of giving change lives. Acts of giving can be powerful in business regardless of the size.  We can give many things. Here is a list of the types of giving that make a real impact in a business community.

1. Give a referral opportunity between two other businesses you know—maybe a supplier of yours and a client of yours.
2. Give mentoring to a business that needs your expertise.
3. Give your knowledge to local business groups.
4. Give to local education and youth community groups.
5. Give to the elders of the community.

All of this giving activity is part of an eco-system that will come back and benefit you and those you care about in a positive way. You choose how to practice Givers Gain that is right for your business. Once you make a commitment to using the power of Givers Gain to fuel your business, success will follow.

The more this happens then the more energy can be given to important global social concerns such as climate change and sustainability of our planet. Infinite giving allows us to focus on the bigger picture. The bigger picture is living in a world of plenty where resources are plentiful, and the struggle of life is not against each other. Rather, it is against suffering and scarcity.

Based on material from Infinite Giving, The Seven Laws of Givers Gain.

Called the “father of modern networking” by CNN, Dr. Ivan Misner is a New York Times bestselling author.  He is also the Founder & Chief Visionary Officer of BNI (www.bni.com), the world’s largest business networking organization.  His latest book, Infinite Giving, The 7 Principles of Givers Gain^® is a book about building a life and business where you don’t have to choose between winning or helping others.