Art of Networking
Ask and the Door Will Be Opened
The key to making referrals work for you.
A BNI Chapter Meeting Educational Moment

By Sam Schwartz, Executive Director - BNI Northern Virginia,
National Director - BNI-Israel, BNI-Hungary, BNI-Romania

Conceptually, most people understand the idea of referrals. But getting and giving a referral isn't so simple.

Pretend you are in a room of 30 people, and you ask everyone to take out their keys. You look around and find who has the most keys on their ring. You then take that key ring. You say to the roomful of people: "There are 30 people in this room. Would you agree that there are more keys than people?"

After everyone agrees, you pick up one key from the key ring you borrowed and ask, "Can anybody tell me what door this key can open?"

When most everyone shakes their head, you say, "The only person who can give me the right answer is hopefully the person I borrowed the keys from."

This silly story demonstrates that referrals are really about opening doors for one another. Your job as a member is to tell us which doors you would like us to open for you; our job is to look at our keys and see if we have the right key to open that door.

It's All about Trust
Now that you have the key, you must find out if the person who gave it to you will trust you with it. Turn to them and ask, "Can I take the keys with me?"

The person usually refuses. How can they know you are trustworthy?

This is the second stage of the referral: building trust. Within a trusting relationship, a person might give up their home key or office key. But without that trust, we clench the key, consequently missing out on an open door.

Really, it's this simple: As a BNI member you need to tell the rest of us which doors you want us to open for you, and we need to find you the right key. But remember, the key to making the key work is trust.


Maximizing Your Return on Relationships
Grow your referrals through effective one-on-ones.
by Jeff Weir, Managing Area Director, BNI North Carolina

Successful BNI members will tell you that strong relationships equal results. BNI is the one place where you can earn the best return on relationships.

One-on-one meetings are like exercise: hard work but worth it! Joining a BNI chapter and not doing consistent one-on-ones is like becoming a member of a health club, but not going to the gym to exercise! It won't do any good. You will not get the results you want.

Productive, results-oriented BNI members realize that one-on-one meetings with other BNI members are one of the best exercises you can do to maximize your BNI membership.

Let's see how productive your one-on-one meetings are:

• Are you learning how to give more referrals when you are on a one-on-one?
• Do you discuss mostly personal information or business?
• Do you walk away with a better understanding of how your BNI business partner operates their business?
• Do you now feel comfortable enough with that person to pass them referrals?
• Do you have the information to help them build their contact sphere within the chapter?
• Did you schedule another meeting for follow up and accountability?

Know More, Receive More
Harvey Mackay, author of Swim With the Sharks (Without Being Eaten Alive,) and nationally syndicated columnist, is one of the world's ultimate relationship builders.

He believes in knowing his prospects, customers, and employees very well. To this end, his sales team collects information about clients using the "Mackay 66"—a 66-point questionnaire. Through this interview, Mackay creates a profile that details the vital statistics of a client's life.

Why go through all of this effort? As Mackay points out, "If the only thing that determined a sale were the lowest bid, it could all be done by machine. People buy from people. The more you know about them, the more they're flattered, the more they're at ease—and the more they buy."

This strategy must work, because at age 26 he purchased a small, failing envelope company, and now, 40 years later, it has grown to an $85 million business, employing over 500 people.

To maximize your return on relationships you need to know everything you can about the people in your network—then you can leverage that knowledge and become a powerful connector of people. Follow the acronym G.A.I.N.S. to discover at least five things about your BNI business partners:

Goals
Accomplishments
Interests
Networks
Skills

Remember, the more you know, the more help you can offer and experience the effects of Givers Gain.