May 2007
Art of NetworkingBe sure to set your printer to "landscape" mode before printing.
Art of Networking
Nothing Is as Fast as the Speed of Trust
Why trust is essential to a thriving business.
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—Edward Marshall
If you're not fast, you're dead.
—Jack Welch
What is the primary benefit that BNI offers its members? What benefit could be so powerful that it would account for BNI's rapid global growth? The answer is SPEED.
The primary advantage of a trusted network, or a "trustwork™" as we like to call it, is the SPEED with which you do business. And the secret to this is TRUST. We call it The SPEED of TRUST™. We contend that nothing is as fast as The SPEED of TRUST.
We recently moved into larger offices—a daunting task when added to the demands of operating a business. To make matters worse, this move required a new phone system well beyond the sophistication of our current one. Comparing all the options and discerning which enterprise level phone system to choose was daunting.
Enter TRUST. Through a trusted friend, we were referred to his trusted phone expert, who has a proven track record. We saved weeks of time! As old Ben Franklin said, "Time is money." Yes, SPEED is the ultimate benefit of trusted referrals.
For years we have taught that people no longer buy from those they like but from those they trust. Referrals transfer this trust. Contrary to what most people believe, trust is not some soft, elusive quality that you either have or don't. Rather, trust is a pragmatic, tangible, performance multiplier that you can create—much faster than you probably think possible.
As New York Times columnist Thomas Friedman observes in The World Is Flat, this new "flat" economy revolves around partnering and relationships. And partnering and relationships thrive or die based on trust. Friedman states, "Without trust, there is no open society, because there are not enough police to patrol every opening in an open society. Without trust, there can also be no flat world, because it is trust that allows us to take down walls, remove barriers, and eliminate friction at borders. Trust is essential for a flat world … "
Who Do You Trust, and Who Trusts You?
So who do you trust? Think about your own experience with regard to this question. Do you trust a friend? A work associate? Your boss? Your spouse? A parent? A child? Why do you trust this person? What is it that inspires confidence in this particular relationship?
Now consider an even more provocative question: Who trusts you? Or who trusts you enough to refer people to you? At home? At work? Someone you've just met? Someone you've known for a long time? What is it in you that inspires people to trust you? If you would like to find out how trusted you are by others, take a brief, free survey at www.whotrustsyou.com.
Most of us tend to think about trust in terms of character—of being a good, sincere, ethical person. While character is foundational, competence is also important. Character includes your integrity, motive, and intent with people. Competence includes your capabilities, skills, results, and track record. Both are vital.
With increased focus on ethics in our society, the character side of trust is fast becoming the price of entry into the new, global economy. However, the differentiating and often ignored side of trust—competence—is equally essential.
How Credible Are You?
In our corporate training programs, we often do a one-to-one, pre-work exercise with individual participants in which they are given picture cards of the people with whom they work and asked to quickly sort them into two stacks: "I tend to trust this person" or "I tend to not trust this person." It's always fascinating to see how fast people make these decisions. Most individuals have an immediate reaction of trust or distrust. It's also interesting that, in most cases, the same people tend to be trusted or not trusted.
Think about the people you know, one by one. Which stack would you immediately put their pictures in? Why? Now, for the tougher question: If your picture were included in a group of picture cards, which stack would your associates put your picture in? And why?
As you continue to network, keep in check how "trustworthy" you are—it will make the difference in the speed with which you grow your business. We contend that the ability to establish, grow, extend, and restore trust is the key business and leadership competency of the new, global economy; and we have identified 13 behaviors common to high trust leaders throughout the world. Our experience shows that those who master and demonstrate these behaviors and become high-trust individuals are more likely to be promoted, make more money, receive the best opportunities, get more referrals and have more fulfilling and joyful relationships. They enjoy ever-expanding spheres of influence in their businesses and their lives.
Stephen M.R. Covey is the author of The Speed of Trust—The One Thing That Changes Everything, a groundbreaking and paradigm-shifting book published by Simon & Schuster, New York and London. Covey is co-founder and CEO and Greg Link is co-founder and President of CoveyLink Worldwide, a boutique global consultancy on trust and ethics in the business and social sectors. They equip their clients to install trust as a hard-edged economic driver—a learnable and measurable core competency that makes their organizations more profitable, people more promotable, and relationships more energizing.
To purchase The Speed of Trust, go to Barnes & Noble.com, Amazon.com, or your favorite bookseller. To discover how trusted you are by others, go to www.whotrustsyou.com for a brief, free analysis.
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3 Networking Faux Pas
Think you're a good networker? Make sure you're not making these blunders.
After two decades of running the world's largest networking organization, I've seen a lot of networking faux pas. I've put together a few of the most glaring blunders in networking etiquette I've seen over the years that you should avoid.
Faux Pas #1: Not responding quickly to referral partners
This one really troubles me. I can't imagine getting a call from a networking partner and not responding immediately. Unfortunately, it happens with regularity. Not long ago, someone I know had a referral to give a gentleman in his networking group. As soon as he knew the referral was viable, he called the associate and left a message at his office. A day went by without a return call, so he called again, saying it was important to connect.
He was finally able to speak to his networking associate at their next meeting. He asked him why he didn't return his call, and the associate said, "If I knew you had a referral for me, I would've called you back immediately." He still gave the referral at the meeting, and, to no one's surprise, the person referred ended up working with another vendor because no one got back to him in a timely manner.
Treating each of your networking partners as one of your best clients is critical. Return phone calls immediately, as it speaks to your credibility and reliability as a professional.
There are countless examples of people receiving referrals at networking groups and then contacting the referral a few days later. The old phrase "If you snooze, you lose" is apropos here. When the referral knows you had her name and number on Monday and took your time calling, that sends a negative message about your business.
Faux Pas #2: Confusing networking with direct selling
A BNI director struck up a conversation with a woman business owner at a networking function. When the business owner asked our director what she did, she said she helps owners build their businesses through networking and referrals. The business owner smiled and said, "I'm really good at networking. I've been doing it for a long, long time."
Curious, our director asked her, "So what's your secret?" She stood up straight and said, "Well, a friend and I enter a room together. We draw an imaginary line down the middle. She takes the left side; I take the right side. We then meet at a certain time to see who collected the most cards. The loser buys the other one lunch."
The director curiously inquired, "So what do you do with all those cards?" The business owner proudly said, "I enter them into my distribution list and begin to send them information about my services. Since I have all their information, they're all good prospects, right?"
This is a classic example of an entrepreneur thinking networking is simply about gathering contact information and following up on it later. But that's nothing more than glorified cold calling. It gives me the chills. I used to teach cold calling techniques to business people. And I did it enough to know that I didn't want to ever do it again. Since then, I've devoted my professional life to teaching the business community that there's a better way to build long-term business.
Faux Pas #3: Abusing the relationship
There are many ways I've seen networking partners abuse relationships, but the following story is one of the most glaring examples.
A woman I know was invited to attend a 50th birthday party of an associate who used to belong to a networking group in which she also participated. They once had a long-term working relationship, and, out of respect, she decided to attend.
When she got to the door, she looked through the window and noticed people were arranged in a semicircle, listening to a presenter in front of an easel board. When she stepped in, it was very obvious the partygoers were being recruited for a business opportunity. As resentful as the woman felt, she and other mutual friends found it difficult to remove themselves from the "birthday party," despite the fact that the only refreshment being served was the company's diet shake!
Never mislead your networking partners. For that matter, never mislead anyone. Trust is everything when you're talking about relationship networking. Inviting people to a "birthday party" that turns out to be a business opportunity pitch isn't being honest with the very people with whom you want to build a trusting relationship.
All three of these faux pas directly relate to good people skills. The prevailing theme is to treat your referral partners and potential referral partners with professionalism and care. Use networking opportunities to meet people and begin the process of developing a genuine relationship. As you do this, treat your referral partner like you would a top client. Lastly, always network in a way that builds credibility and trust—be candid in telling your referral partners what you need and what you're asking of them. Do these things and you'll avoid some serious mistakes in relationship networking.
Called the father of modern networking, Dr. Ivan Misner is the Founder of BNI and the senior partner for the Referral Institute. He has written nine books, including his recently released New York Times best seller Truth or Delusion? Busting Networking's Biggest Myths.
BNI in the News
Word-of-Mouth
It is the world's best-known marketing secret. Everyone knows about it, but hardly anyone does it well. It's time to change your approach to word-of-mouth marketing.
What if there was a way to build your business, year in and year out, regardless of fluctuations in the economy or the activities of your competition?
Well, there is. It's called word-of-mouth. Word-of-mouth marketing truly is the world's best-known marketing secret. You're probably wondering how anything can be both the "best-known" and "a secret" at the same time. Easy. Practically every businessperson knows how important word-of-mouth marketing is. Yet almost no one truly understands how to build their business through word-of-mouth.
Read this article
It's Not NET-SIT or NET-EAT … It's NETWORK!
If you want your networking to be effective, this is the adage you need to follow.
Jerry Schwartz, a.k.a "The Networking Guru of Maryland," is the Executive Director of BNI, the largest business referral organization in Maryland. Besides BNI meetings, Jerry regularly attends networking events at Chambers of Commerce, Rotary Clubs, business expos, and networking functions everywhere in Maryland.
Read this article
Merging Black and White Makes Grey?
I attended a Business Network International (BNI) meeting earlier this week and was fortunate to have a chat with the national director, Curtis Belgrave. The meeting room was filled with BNI members from all four local chapters and several visitors who were brought by some of the BNI members. There were approximately 130 people in the room.
What struck me, however, was not the large number of members showing support for their organization, but the racial mix of the people present.
Read this article
BNI India Featured in the Economic Times
Following our Big Breakfast, the Economic Times featured BNI India on February 16, 2007. (This is the equivalent of the Wall Street Journal in the US or the Financial Times in the UK.)
The article states, "The best bet for many young entrepreneurs often is to participate in forums that are provided by business networking professionals like Business Network International (BNI)."
Read this article
BNI's Networking Sex Survey: Do Men and Women Approach Networking Differently?
An innovative online survey is now being conducted by the authors of a forthcoming book on gender and networking, to study this fascinating question.
Business networking is a practice that occurs every day, everywhere across the globe; but have you ever wondered whether men and women approach networking differently?
New York Times best-selling author Dr. Ivan Misner and Hazel Walker and Frank De Raffele are three people who did wonder whether the sexes approach networking differently. Together, they will be co-authoring a book on the subject, based on the findings from an online survey which is available now for the general public to participate in.
To read this article, click here.
To take the "Networking and the Sexes" survey now, visit: http://www.surveymonkey.com/s.asp?u=204762616512
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Are Women Better Networkers than Men?
Observations about how your gender influences your networking strategy.
This article is a summary of an address presented to BNI Sydney Inner West (Australia) at their inaugural International Networking Day event on February 6, 2007.
The way of doing business has changed dramatically in the past ten years. No longer are we operating in a predominately male workspace, using the traditional male style of direct communication. So what impact has the influx of women had on using networking to build business, and are they doing it better than their male colleagues?
In doing the research for my book Gender Games: Doing Business with the Opposite Sex, I found that, as it pertains to communication, men typically focus on information, while women typically focus on relationships. The most popular tool for measuring individual style and preferences, the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator, distinguishes between "thinking" and "feeling" styles of making decisions and communicating. Not surprisingly, two-thirds of all men who complete the profile score highly as "thinkers," while two-thirds of the women rate highest as "feelers."
Well-known linguist and pioneer of male/female communication style differences, Deborah Tannen, proposes that, generally speaking, men use language to preserve their independence and maintain their position in the group, while women use language to create connection and intimacy. There seems to be a theme here! (And yes, we are generalizing; there are always exceptions to the rule.)
Let's be a fly on the wall at a typical networking event. What are differences in behavior as you move from group to group? An all-male group is likely talking business or sports, with most members of the group competing to demonstrate their status and knowledge. Rarely, personal information is exchanged or vulnerability is shown.
In contrast, an all-female group is likely to be having a personal conversation. While they may also be talking business, it will be from the perspective of sharing information, offering assistance, and talking about mistakes they have made so that the others can benefit from their experience.
What Is Your Networking Strength?
One key way networking has changed is that it is now seen as a method to create strategic alliances rather than as a means of selling your products or services. A recent article in the Harvard Business Review by Herminia Ibarra and Mark Hunter identifies three types of networks: operational, personal, and strategic. It proposes that effective leaders learn to develop and employ all these networks for strategic purposes.
According to Ibarra and Hunter, the operational network helps you manage your internal responsibilities and build strong working relationships with people who enable you to do your job; your personal network enables you to build contacts outside your organization for referrals, information, and often coaching and mentoring support; and, strategic networks are for creating leverage and links—the ability to marshal information, support, and resources from one sector of a network to achieve results in another.
So which communication style would be the most effective in developing operational and personal networks, and creating strategic alliances?
That's where the conundrum occurs! Research clearly shows that business today is about relationships, specifically, making and maintaining contacts. And women, who are predominately relationship-focused, are naturally exceptional at that. So when it comes to building good networks in their operational and personal spheres, women are usually stronger than men. However, men seem better at using contacts and connections to build strategic alliances and asking for business.
When I surveyed 1,200 businesswomen on what they felt was the major thing holding them back in business today, 38% said "lack of self promotion." Yet research consistently confirms that men are far more confident than women in promoting their abilities. In fact, they tend to oversell themselves, while women tend to undersell themselves.
So could it be argued that women tend to excel at networking that demands building relationships and making connections? And are men arguably still leading the charge on networking that generates successful strategic alliances? That's how I see it—what have you observed?
Candy Tymson is an expert in communication and gender differences with a Master's Degree in Human Resource Management and Coaching. Based in Sydney, she is a professional speaker and facilitator and the author of Gender Games: Doing Business with the Opposite Sex.
For information on her workshops, presentations and products:
Phone: 02 9976 6777
Fax: 02 9976 6788
Email: candy@tymson.com.au
Website: www.tymson.com.au
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So, tell us what you think! Do men and women approach networking differently?
You are invited to participate in an innovative on-line survey to study this fascinating idea. This short survey will only take a few minutes of your time. The findings will be used as the basis for a book on gender and networking that will be developed in the near future. Your honest opinions and comments are greatly appreciated and will be kept completely confidential.
Click here to take the survey now.
My BNI Story
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I have been a member of BNI a mere three months, and it's already transformed my business.
While referrals are a significant reason for my success, the education and training BNI has provided has transformed me.
I quit my job and went out on my own less than a year ago. It took about nine months before I realized that, while I may be a talented web designer, I was clueless about running my own business. I knew I needed help, and based on a friend's recommendation, I joined BNI.
I jumped in with both feet and tried to follow the BNI strategies. Each meeting, I began to understand that if I followed the system it would pay off.
And it has. When I joined BNI I had a handful of clients. I now have three times that, and at least twice as many as that in the pipeline. The amazing thing is that, while all this has happened since I joined BNI, only about half of these have actually come through BNI members. The BNI methodology taught me an entirely new way of thinking that I have been able to apply outside of the BNI network.
I want to thank David and Weston, and the leadership of the Mt. Lebanon BNI group. I checked out other networking groups before joining BNI and none had the energy, spirit of friendliness, and support that I experience every Thursday with my Mt. Lebanon Chapter.
Submitted by Pauline Connelly, Pittsburgh, PA
http://www.connellyp.com
The BNI Chain Reaction
I recently joined BNI and belong to the Sky High BNI chapter in Palm Beach, Florida. My daughter has a store that sells Bali Imports in Palm Beach. Recently, she shipped a furniture item to Kansas City, which showed up damaged. Since it would cost too much to ship it back and make the repairs, she tried to find a furniture repair shop in Kansas City to fix the furniture. However, she realized she had no idea who would do a good job. Since the client was also new to the area, he didn't know anyone in the area either. I thought of BNI and got online, where I located Frank LaPlace in Kansas City. The rest is history. He referred me to an interior decorator BNI member who knew a furniture restorer. Everyone is now happy, and I say WOW! BNI, this is quite an organization that I have joined.
Submitted by Lois Leatherman, Sky High BNI Chapter, Palm Beach, FL
The Benefits of Joining Ecademy
Joining Ecademy to extend my efforts within BNI has been both fruitful and fascinating. Although a recent subscriber, I have already passed several referrals to BNI colleagues. Helping people connect is very rewarding!
Submitted by Tanya, BNI Amethyst, Milton Keynes, UK
Want to learn more about Ecademy? Visit www.bni.ecademy.com.
Breaking News
Dr. Ivan Misner Launches Weekly Conversation with Worldwide MembershipEver wish you could have a weekly one-to-one with Dr. Ivan Misner? Now you can, by subscribing to the Official BNI Podcast.
Your free subscription provides you with a weekly 5-10 minute audio message from Dr. Misner, who asks you to hold up your end of the conversation by posting comments and questions at BNIPodcast.com. Tell him what you're thinking. Ask that burning question. Offer your suggestions and solutions-focused comments.
Launched April 11, 2007, the Official BNI Podcast brings Dr. Misner's worldwide audience a weekly dose of his wit and wisdom on the topic of word-of-mouth marketing, as well as techniques for getting the most from a BNI membership. The downloadable recordings, along with short synopses and complete text transcriptions, can be found at http://www.BNIPodcast.com.
"After promoting Norm Dominguez to CEO of BNI last year, I have assumed the full-time role of Founder and Chairman," Dr. Misner explains. "My job now is primarily to be the spokesperson for BNI, to talk to members directly through as many vehicles as possible. That's why I love this concept of the podcast. It lets me talk directly to members and allows them to give me their feedback."
"I see this podcast as a way for me to flatten the communication hierarchy," Dr. Misner continues. "It allows me to communicate directly to members and directors worldwide on a weekly basis, and lets them respond with their comments and questions right on the web site."
Despite his packed calendar and incredible travel schedule, which takes him around the world on an annual basis, Dr. Misner is able to record the podcasts by telephone from anywhere. Podcast producer and co-host Frank Felker handles all the technical details from his home studio in the Washington, DC area.
Felker, a BNI member, approached Dr. Misner with the concept shortly after joining a local chapter. "I felt that a podcast was the perfect medium for him to create a consistent and intimate connection with his membership," Felker explains. "I was elated when he immediately embraced the idea."
Dr. Misner has big plans for the Official BNI Podcast. Upcoming episodes will include a worldwide calendar of BNI events, special information for chapter Education Coordinators, "meeting stimulants" designed to keep chapter meetings exciting and enjoyable, and interviews with special guests, including Dr. Misner's many high-profile friends from the worlds of publishing and entrepreneurial education.
The free recordings can be played right from your web browser while visiting the site, downloaded manually to your computer for later listening, transferred to an audio CD or mp3 player, or downloaded automatically each time they are posted via free subscription through the iTunes Music Store or other podcast directories, such as Yahoo Podcasts.
For more information, click the "About" button at the top of the homepage at http://www.BNIPodcast.com.
The BNI Foundation
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| BNI Foundation Administrator Beth Misner presents the Oakmont Elementary School with their BNI mini-grant. |
The BNI-Misner Foundation has been busy this year reviewing applications for mini-grants and funding many worthwhile projects that benefit children with their education. Some of the projects funded by the Foundation so far this school year include:
• Bonita Unified School District CA, PTA Reflections Program
• Oakmont Elementary, Claremont CA, Science Project
• Art Road Non Profit Corporation
• Big City Mountaineers
• Danville Museum of Fine Arts
• Sports Outreach International, Mexico
• East Cobb Christian School
• Sabra Hebrew Day Camp
The BNI Foundation is still accepting applications for their $1000 mini-grants. The criteria are that the projects be supporting children and education and must go to a non-profit organization. The Executive Board of Advisors votes on each application and the ones approved are awarded the funds. Of course, the best applicants are those referred to the BNI-Misner Foundation by BNI members, so if you have a teacher or other volunteer for a worthy charity which supports children and education in your life, feel free to let them know about these mini grants. More information can be obtained by viewing the Foundation website at www.bni.org.
Any members wishing to support BNI's charitable work may send donations to the BNI-Misner Foundation, 545 College Commerce Way, Upland CA 91711. Chapters or individuals who send donations of $200 or more may direct those funds to the charity of their choice. This allows BNI chapters to support local charities through the BNI Foundation.
Submitted by Beth Misner, BNI Foundation Administrator