From the Founder
How Deep Is Your Network?
by Dr. Ivan Misner, Founder and Chairman, BNI

Recently, someone I barely knew contacted me and asked if I would promote his business service within my networking organization. I considered this person a business associate, but definitely not someone I knew very well. That request made me think about how many people assume that if they have met you, they can ask for something that only a close associate would be willing to do.

Master Networkers know that having a good contact doesn't necessarily make someone a good connection. Having run an international networking organization for more than two decades, the most important thing I have learned is, it is not "what you know," or "who you know"—it is "how well you know them" that really counts in building a powerful personal network.

This means that your network must not only be "broad," it must also be "deep." Unfortunately, I believe most people focus on the broad aspect more than the deep aspect. That is, they concentrate on making more and more contacts hoping to find that one special person that will solve their business needs this month.

When developing a reliable and effective network, it is very important to keep depth in mind as much as breadth! What do I mean by this? When you need to rely on others to help you out (promote your program to their client base or cross market your products), it is critical that you have done the work of strengthening your connections well in advance of your need.

When you are considering asking someone in your personal network for a favor, ask yourself if they are a "contact" or a "connection." In this context, a contact is someone you know, but with whom you haven't fully established a strong relationship. On the other hand, a connection is someone who knows you and trusts you because you have taken the time to establish credibility with them.

Unrealistic expectations of your network come from trying to "use" your network for support that your contacts might not feel you deserve or feel they have no obligation to provide. You really do have to earn the loyalty and engagement of your referral sources. You want your network to have very deep roots.

In Southern California, we have many huge, tall, and lush eucalyptus trees topple over fairly easily in heavy winds almost every year. When they blow over, uprooted by the wind, you can see that their root system is broad and wide, but not very deep at all. Don't let this happen (figuratively) to you! Following are some tangible ways to deepen the roots of your network.

Build quality relationships: Take the time necessary to deepen the relationships between you and your referral sources. We are all driven and pressed for time, but in order to deepen your networking relationships, you must make the time to go beyond the normal business interactions with those from whom you want to be able to ask for support. Invite them to appropriate social functions, backyard barbecues, and sporting events. Get to know these key people outside of the business environment whenever possible. The more of a friendship you can count between you, the more expectations you can both have from each other's networking efforts.

Find places to network that will build deep roots: There are the tried and true places to network, such as referral groups like BNI, networking mixers, social events, and online networks. I talk about several different types of networks that you should consider at this link:

http://www.entrepreneur.com/article/0,4621,305516,00.html

Remember, however, it is not enough to just show up; you must establish credibility with people before you can expect them to help you in some way. When someone tries to hurry the process they tend to hurt relationships, not build their business.

Change your focus from "What's in it for me?" to "What can I offer you?": This is perhaps the most powerful technique for deepening AND widening your networks. When building a deep network, do the things you can to bring business and contacts to your networking partners. Share pertinent information with them; invite them to business meetings that will position them favorably with others they need to get to know. Keep in mind that you want to get to the point where your networking partners know you always have something to give them. In short, do what it takes to "earn" the help you might need to ask for down the road. It's no wonder that the most effective and powerful networking entrepreneurs live by the philosophy that "givers gain."

I hope you are seeing a trend in each of these points. When deepening your network, you want to focus on giving to your referral sources. It's that tried and true analogy of farming versus hunting when building a business through word of mouth. Give your time, give your knowledge, and give what your referral sources need to succeed. As you develop stronger networking skills, it's better to put on the farmer's overalls and cultivate the connections you need to be able to call in support for programs and products you want to promote.

We all know that the best time to plant an oak tree was 25 years ago; however, the next best time is right now! It's never too late to change your focus and develop business relationships with very deep roots, as well as far-reaching breadth.

Dr. Ivan Misner is a New York Times bestselling author. He is also the Founder & Chairman of BNI (www.bni.com), the world's largest referral organization with thousands of Chapters in dozens of countries around the world. His latest book, Masters of Success can be viewed at www.MastersofSuccess.biz. Dr. Misner is also the Founder of the Referral Institute, a referral training company (www.referralinstitute.com). He resides in Southern California with his wife, Elisabeth, and their three children. He can be reached at misner@bni.com.