Art of Networking
Cure the Underdeveloped Network Syndrome
By Anne Baber & Lynne Waymon, co-authors of Make Your Contacts Count: Networking Know-How for Business and Career Success

What ails your network? Is it underdeveloped? Most are. People join groups and assume they have networking relationships with the other members. But they generally don't. Here's a fresh look at the various kinds of networking relationships you may develop. Once you know what kind of relationship you have with someone, then the next steps to develop the relationship become obvious.

It helps to imagine your network as a bulls-eye, each concentric circle representing a different networking relationship:

Accidents
Accidents float outside the concentric circles. You're in seat 14A. Next to you, in 14B, is an Accident. An Accident is a person you'll never see again, unless you make it happen: exchange contact information and get back in touch. In one study, 27 percent of people developed a relationship with someone they met on an airplane. But it's not smart to rely on meeting people by chance.

Acquaintances
Inside the outermost circle, imagine the word Acquaintance. An Acquaintance is a person you could find again if you had to because you know someone in common. Think of the architect you met at your cousin's daughter's wedding. You won't run into him in the normal course of your life. Remember your Acquaintances when you want to diversify your network. Cultivating an Acquaintance will bring you in touch with people whom you don't normally have contact.

Associates
Inside the next circle, imagine the word Associate. An Associate is a person who belongs to a group to which you belong. That means, you'll see him/her repeatedly.

We believe it takes six to eight meetings before two people know and trust each other enough to go to bat for each other. Associates, whom you'll see again and again, are your easiest contacts to develop. However (and this is one of the biggest mistakes networkers make), if you don't develop these relationships, you will remain only co-members of a group. You won't act as resources for each other.

Actors
Once you have acted by exchanging something of value—a tip, a resource, some information—you convert Associates into Actors. Actors are people with whom you are actively trading. When you give first, you plug into the basis for strong networking relationships: The Reciprocity Principle. It goes like this. If you give somebody something, he will try to give you something back. Two-way swaps are the meat and potatoes of networking.

Advocates
But there are ways to make relationships even more relevant. When that happens, you and your contact will be able to help each other even more. Advocates (inside the next circle) know you so well and trust you so completely that, when they see an opportunity with your name on it, they'll grab it and give it to you. Because you've taught them so much about yourself, they'll unhesitatingly pass your name along to others. Advocates can give vivid examples of you in action, serving a client, saving the day, or solving a problem.

Allies
Finally, in the center circle, you'll have a few Allies. Allies are on your personal board of directors. They know where you're headed and will do all they can to help you reach your goals. They will actually seek out opportunities for you. And you'll do the same for them. They'll celebrate with you when things go well, as well as commiserate with you—and even tell you the truth—when things go wrong.

Take a minute to think about your networking contacts. Draw the bulls-eye and decide which "A" best describes each of your contacts. Then you'll be able to determine what your next step could be with each person. If you want to move from Actor to Advocate with a contact, for example, tell stories so your contact will be able to describe your capabilities to others. Ask for stories from your contact so you can reciprocate.

Using this model will help you create a fully developed network and help you make networking an art, not an accident.

Anne Baber and Lynne Waymon are co-founders of Contacts Count and co-authors of 5 books on networking and career management. Visit them at www.ContactsCount.com.