BNI SuccessNet - July/August 2004

3 steps to effective communication.
by Connie Hinton, Executive Director, BNI-NW

"I’m not getting good referrals from BNI."

That is a statement I frequently hear from members. In most cases it turns out the member does get referrals, just not the ones they want. And, after asking a few questions, it usually comes to light that the member is getting exactly what they’re asking for; they’re just not asking for the right thing. That’s miscommunication.

To illustrate this idea, here’s an example that happens in many homes.

A wife says to her husband, “The trash needs to go out.” What the wife means is, “Please take the trash out.” The husband may agree that the trash needs to go out, but doesn’t understand his wife is asking him to do it. Nothing happens and both end up frustrated.

Strong, profitable, long-term relationships depend on good communication. It isn’t easy, and it takes time and effort to develop. The first place that happens in a BNI relationship is with a member’s Sales Manager minute. There are three points to developing them effectively: be specific, be clear, and get feedback.

Be specific
Many people object to being specific in their Sales Manager minute (or commercial) because they feel that it will limit their referrals. My experience has been that you will get better and more profitable referrals because they focus directly on the prospects you want. I’ve found that many times when you ask for a specific person in a specific company, you may not receive an introduction to that person, but you will connect with someone else who is equally as good.

People also tend to make requests passively instead of asking directly. The person receiving the request doesn’t understand that they have been asked to take action. Then you get frustrated when nothing happens, as in the above illustration.

This is what happens with many referral requests in chapters. You feel you are being specific with our commercials. Yet, other members don’t understand who they are looking for, or what they need to do to bring that ideal referral to you.

Be clear
Give your Sales Manager minute in plain English. Avoid industry jargon that means little to your audience.

Remember you are training your sales team. Give them the tools to promote you, which include phrases to listen for, written information to distribute, and cues prospects will give that will lead your fellow members to start the conversation.

Get feedback
Ensure that your sales team understands your message by asking questions. One-on-one dance cards are the best place to clarify your message since it is an informal setting and allows for more give and take of ideas.

Here are some questions that you can ask your fellow members to help you communicate your referral requests more effectively:

Is your Sales Manager Minute clear and concise?
Are you being specific enough in your referral request?
Is there a call to action for your sales team to find a specific person?
Do you give your fellow members the cues to watch for or listen to so they can introduce you to your ideal prospects?
Are you asking for feedback from your sales team so you can ensure the message you are giving is being interpreted correctly?

Communication is one of the keys to achieving a greater return on relationships. Remember, you get what you ask for so make sure you’re asking for what you want. A quote from Dale Carnegie sums it up well, "There are four ways, and only four ways, in which we have contact with the world. We are evaluated and classified by these four contacts: what we do, how we look, what we say, and how we say it."