BNI SuccessNet - Fourth Quarter 2002

This is the place where you can ask any question about BNI. If you have a question for BNI's CEO and Founder, Dr. Ivan Misner, send it to askbni@bni.com. He will post his response here, as space allows. From time to time, a guest Director will post a response. You may view other questions Dr. Misner is posed by going to www.entrepreneur.com/Community/CO_ExpertsInfo/1,4586,300965-----,00.html, where Dr. Misner participates in Entrepreneur.com's Ask the Networking Expert.

Q: Why doesn't BNI track referrals that members give to other chapters?

Anonymous (New Zealand)

A: In the early days of BNI we used to track referrals from other chapters. The problem was... stretching the truth was RAMPANT! Quality control is hard when you say you have a "good referral" for someone who isn't there every week. It was a great idea that was problematic on execution and was therefore dropped. This doesn't mean you shouldn't give referrals to members in other groups... you should. We simply don't "track" them.

Dr. Ivan Misner

Q: First let me say, I'm enjoying reading your work. I am a member of BNI and I love the concept. As a Management Consultant with a Training LDC, I have no problem interacting and presenting in the group. I have a colleague, however, who is terrified to give her 10-minute presentation. She's great in the one to one setting, but the group presentation paralyzes her. It's not the content of her presentation; it's the process of getting up in front of the group and speaking. What advice can you give to someone with this great fear?

Thanks,
Lynda

A: Thanks for your question as well as your kind words about BNI. I've seen this problem a lot both in, and out, of the organization. In many surveys I've seen over the years, people have ranked the fear of "public speaking" higher than the fear of dying! Standing and talking to an audience of people for 10+ minutes can be frightening, especially to people that don't do it often.

There's an excellent audio CD from a past BNI Director's Conference entitled "How to Give Effective 10 Minute Presentations" that I recommend. It is by Lance Mead, a BNI Executive Director in New York. You can get the CD by contacting shipping@bni.com and ordering it.

Also, Joe McBride has an excellent piece that involves presentations in the book Masters of Networking. His contribution begins on page 103.

Here are some of my suggestions for people who are nervous doing public presentations:

PREPARE, PREPARE, PREPARE. Don't wing it! Have an outline of what you want to say and practice it.

Be specific and talk about things you know best. Don't try to teach people everything you do. Focus on no more than 2 or 3 areas of what you want them to learn about. Most importantly, cover topics that you feel you understand the best. This will reduce some of your stress.

Have handouts or visuals to help support your presentation. For people who are worried about "stage fright", these props can help carry them through the talk.

Remember, you're the expert. Think about ways that help show that AND are not threatening for you.

This last item is really important to remember.

Many years ago when BNI had only 60 Chapters or so (we have around 2,500 now), I met a CPA at a group who asked me if she absolutely HAD to do the 10-minute presentation. I told her that everyone in the group needed to do them. She then informed me that in that case... she quit! As you might suspect, I was taken off guard with that and I asked her why. She told me that it took everything in her power to stand and do the 60- second presentation (which, according to her, she never used more than 30 seconds before she sat down shaking in fear).

She then, in no uncertain terms, informed me that if she was REQUIRED to speak for 10 minutes - she would have to quit because it was just way to stressful for her. I told her not to quit and that we wouldn't "make" her speak if she didn't want to. This seemed to alleviate some of her anxiety and we continued talking. I told her that if she didn't do the presentation it would eliminate an important opportunity to educate the members about what she did. She acknowledged that but insisted that "speaking" was just to stressful for her.

I then changed my approach and asked her how she felt about giving a "test"? I asked her if she could come up with 10 True/False questions about the tax law and small business and asked if she could just "read" the questions and "read" the answers. She thought for a moment and said, "yes", she could do that easily enough... as long as she didn't have to do a "speech". I told her that was no problem; it would be informative and helpful to the members.

Well, the day she "read" the "test" was hysterical. About three questions into her "test" she started becoming more and more animated. As the "test" went, on she went further and further off her written answers and responded to questions and discussions in a very professional, humorous, and informative manner. After 15 minutes... the President had to nudge her along to wrap up because it was going over time. She was SHOCKED! She totally lost track of time and completely lost her fear because she wasn't doing a "speech", she was doing a "test".

The bottom line is - people should do a presentation that they feel comfortable with. That's different for everyone. Think creatively about what you know and what you feel comfortable doing to express that knowledge.

Dr. Ivan Misner

Q: Unfortunately, I believe more than a few members see BNI as a police force rather than as a support function. The strict attendance, weekly meetings, structured formats, reporting, focus on referrals, etc., are seen through their eyes as overly oppressive.

Those of us who have kept organizations going for long periods of times understand that these rules are not meant as frivolous penalties, but instead reflect the real-world fact that when any group of humans is not kept strictly organized and focused on a single purpose, the group will eventually fall-off and disappear.

If there were some way to explain this to well educated adults to help them understand why things must be run so tightly, we'd both be rich. But in any case, maybe we ought to at least try.

Anonymous (Wisconsin)

A: Yes, BNI does have what some people feel is a lot of structure. Ironically, most people don't realize that "members created the structure" based on what they found worked in BNI. EVERY policy that exists in the organization was developed, reviewed, and voted on by BNI's Board of Advisors made up of members from around the world.

Any successful group of people become that way because of their commitment, hard work, and effort. Getting together is only a beginning, staying together is certainly progress, but working together as a structured team with high expectations is what defines a successful group. Teamwork requires a structure and commitment to the system. A sports team practices together regularly (just has we have weekly meetings). It would be completely unheard of to allow key players to regularly miss practice (attendance requirement), or not follow an exercise regimen (structured format).

Every football player that Vince Lombardi every coached would tell you he was demanding, structured, and an oppressive disciplinarian. He also produced champions. When asked about success, Lombardi once said "the difference between a successful person and others is not a lack of strength, not a lack of knowledge, but rather a lack of will."

People, like water, have a tendency to seek the path of least resistance. They tend to want to do what is easiest, not necessarily what is best. BNI has tried to create a system that focuses on what is best - and I'm afraid it's not always easy - but, it does work.

Yes, BNI is structured. We definitely have a system and we coach members to follow that system. But for those who have the "will", it is a system that produces champions.

Dr. Ivan Misner